Above all, we need to start by acknowledging that for the vast majority of analysts, this war has delivered a shock that does not confirm, but puts in question our sense of reality.
It drives home the point that adopting a realistic approach towards the world does not consist in always reaching for a well-worn toolkit of timeless verities, nor does it consist in affecting a hard-boiled attitude so as to inoculate oneself forever against liberal enthusiasm. Realism, taken seriously, entails a never-ending cognitive and emotional challenge. It involves a minute-by-minute struggle to understand a complex and constantly evolving world, in which we are ourselves immersed, a world that we can, to a degree, influence and change, but which constantly challenges our categories and the definitions of our interests. And in that struggle for realism – the never-ending task of sensibly defining interests and pursuing them as best we can – to resort to war, by any side, should be acknowledged for what it is. It should not be normalised as the logical and obvious reaction to given circumstances, but recognised as a radical and perilous act, fraught with moral consequences. Any thinker or politician too callous or shallow to face that stark reality, should be judged accordingly.
blind skyscrapers
Into this neutral air
Where blind skyscrapers use
Their full height to proclaim
The strength of Collective Man,
Each language pours its vain
Competitive excuse:
But who can live for long
In an euphoric dream;
Out of the mirror they stare,
Imperialism’s face
And the international wrong
[…]
All I have is a voice
To undo the folded lie,
The romantic lie in the brain
Of the sensual man-in-the-street
And the lie of Authority
Whose buildings grope the sky:
There is no such thing as the State
And no one exists alone;
Hunger allows no choice
To the citizen or the police;
We must love one another or die.
“empathy”
My love, I’m grateful tonight
Our listing bed isn’t a raft
Precariously adrift
As we dodge the coast-guard light,And clasp hold of a girl and a boy.
I’m glad that we didn’t wake
Our kids in the thin hours, to take
Not a thing, not a favorite toy,And we didn’t hand over our cash
To one of the smuggling rackets,
That we didn’t buy cheap lifejackets
No better than bright orange trashAnd less buoyant. I’m glad that the dark
Above us, is not deeply twinned
Beneath us, and moiled with wind,
And we don’t scan the sky for a mark,Any mark, that demarcates a shore
As the dinghy starts taking on water.
I’m glad that our six-year old daughter,
Who can’t swim, is a foot off the floorIn the bottom bunk, and our son
With his broken arm’s high and dry,
That the ceiling is not seeping sky,
With our journey but hardly begun.Empathy isn’t generous,
It’s selfish. It’s not being nice
To say I would pay any price
Not to be those who’d die to be us.
“the happiness of living with our backs turned”
We Lived Happily During the War
And when they bombed other people’s houses, we
protested
but not enough, we opposed them but notenough. I was
in my bed, around my bed America
was falling: invisible house by invisible house by invisible house.
I took a chair outside and watched the sun.
In the sixth month
of a disastrous reign in the house of money
in the street of money in the city of money in the country of money,
our great country of money, we (forgive us)
lived happily during the war.
Kaminsky, in a recent interview:
That poem specifically has been shared widely on social media in the wake of Russia’s attack. How do you feel seeing your work resonate, particularly that poem, at this time?
“We Lived Happily During the War” is not a piece of journalism or philosophy, where one might go into facts or questions of ethics. In a poem, one hopes to create an experience in the reader: in this case, the hope of the poem is to help the reader see their own complicity.
The poem doesn’t want to be a pronouncement. The poem is a warning. This is what happens when half-measures take place. “We lived happily during the war,” the poem begins, and it ends with the same words. But by the time it gets to its final line, one hopes the reader might find the horrific irony in that fact of repetition. How many wars can we live through, happily?
One hopes the reader sees the critique of this “we” and what it has done. By the time you get to the repetition of “our country of money” and then to “our great country of money” — one questions the word “great.” That is what art hopes to do: it doesn’t shout at the reader “You must change!” Instead, the reader is changed via the act of reading.
What are you hearing from friends and family right now?
A writer from [Kyiv] tells me he sees people making Molotov cocktails together with their kids. An 80-year-old journalist from Odessa writes: “The air raid just quieted down. It’s a sunny morning.” My cousin tells me potatoes are marked up 50%. A James Joyce translator writes about spending the night sleeping next to a dog in the bomb shelter.
A friend from [Kyiv] emails with a photo of a bullet casing: “There’s a military outpost next to my house, just 1-minute walk. I found this on my balcony. A photo for you — a result of the war in my hand.”
Finally, this conversation I’ll never forget with an older friend from Odessa. After I asked him for any way I could help him, he responded: “Putins come and go. If you want to help, send us some poems and essays. We are starting a new literary magazine.” In the first days of war. Imagine.
hoarding happiness
How could I be living this simple, peaceful existence of making art, prop-styling my apartment for mini photoshoots, listening to my podcasts, eating fresh produce from my garden? How could I justify waking up and creating in my comfort, when so much around me was dying?
Something was off. I was hoarding happiness and it didn’t feel . . . happy. I felt bloated, that kind of “Thanksgiving full” where you overeat and it’s just not fun anymore. There was a dissonance growing, and it was becoming bolder and bigger.
the pre-Borg Complex
L.M. Sacasas (responding to an article about David Chalmers news book on the future of VR technology):
. . . I want to read Chalmers against the grain, which is to say as the unwitting emissary of a fantastical cautionary tale, which invites us not to fear some uncertain future but to reflect more critically on existing trends and patterns.
For example, I wonder for how many of us the experience of the world is already so attenuated or impoverished that we might be tempted to believe that a virtual simulation could prove richer and more enticing? And how many of us already live as if this were in fact the case? How much of my time do I already devote to digitally mediated images and experiences? How often am I lured away from the world before my eyes by the one present through the screen?
The claim that, even now, virtual realities can outstrip my experience of the world is increasingly plausible when I have lost the capacity to wonder at and delight in the gratuity and beauty of the world. And there may be many reasons why such capacities may have diminished, ranging from the ever-more complete enclosure of our experience within a frame of human artifice to the loss of the arts of perception and the power of social structures that eliminate the gift of leisure in principle and in practice for so many. In other words, I mean for us to consider how we might have already begun to sever our relation to our common world long before the virtual worlds Chalmers envisioned are, if ever, realized.
fraught with meaning
Neti, Neti
Are you the ragged yellow fields?
No, the grass, broken and happy.
Are you the air, damp and intimate?
No, the deer’s flag, her hoof muffled in the swamp.
Are you the sun patiently peeling the clouds?
No, the star in the dawn’s throat.
Are you the stones bearing me up on their safari?
No, the acorn’s hat, where its thought grows sweet and whole.
I am all these, and yet none:
Not the red streams flooding the banks of cells.
nor the river hungry for the ocean
nor the crows feather that dandles to the ground
nor the wind trafficking in perfume
nor the little pool holding a syllable of water.
Still, I am where the tongue presses the roof of the mouth,
in the crease of the closed hand,
in the foot hesitating on the stoop,
in the eye that draws its shape on the sky
and lingers, waiting for the face of light.
essential (temporal) vulnerability
Tradition is the ritual abolition of time—this, in a sentence, was Guénon’s discovery and his revelation to the West. To a culture formed by Greek philosophy and biblical religion, he argued that no lasting society could be built on the contemplation of nature or the hope for a life beyond it. Time could be resisted only through tradition—only through the unceasing repetition of acts whose archetypes were thought to be as old as humanity itself. By imitating his ancestors, Guénon argued, the man of tradition was made contemporary with them and so transcended time. He lived in timeless solidarity with the generations that had preceded and would follow him. Neither nature nor history, therefore, could defeat him—for he had nothing of his own, did nothing by himself, and stood for nothing unique. He was merely a member of a sacred series. As Guénon’s greatest interpreter, Mircea Eliade, observed, the life of a traditional man had meaning only under one condition: that he was not an individual at all. What he did had always been done. What he believed had always been believed. His life was one of holy repetition.
As Guénon saw it, the postwar West was littered with mere fragments of knowledge. Modernity had succeeded in severing each branch of knowledge and every practical skill from the “sacred sciences” that once ordered them to wisdom. Guénon lamented that social roles, now dominated by technology, transmitted no spirituality and offered no portals to contemplation. Modern life instead imposed its own empty rituals, which were nothing but a “parody” of the sacred rhythms of traditional life—exacerbating our exposure to historical change, rather than protecting us from it. Guénon concluded that the West was indeed an exceptional civilization: It was exceptionally abnormal in seeking “the destruction of all traditional institutions.”
At the time of his death in 1951, Guénon had largely given up hope that the dissolution of traditional societies could be stopped. He encouraged his followers to hold inwardly to the eternal doctrines that he, in a conspicuous break with tradition, had committed to writing.
[…]
We need not agree with Guénon in order to recognize that he was right about the dismantling of tradition in liberal societies. He understood the civilizational calamity, to say nothing of the human cruelty, of making each generation a stranger to those that precede and follow it. Who we will be, what we will believe, where we will live, how and when we will die—we are now burdened with building our lives from scratch, precisely at the moment when we most need the wisdom of tradition. Guénon was rightly horrified by the nihilism of a culture whose past is stolen through enforced forgetting. And though he was not a believer in any traditional sense, he sought the same consolation many religious people do: refuge in a realm of imperishable truth.
But in imagining a primordial tradition, existing beyond the flow of time, Guénon, paradoxically, drained human life of its meaning. Guénon ignored the personal and embodied dimensions of human experience. No individuals mattered when seen from the horizon of deep time, and no great men or women could shape our common destiny. Guénon’s vision of eternity prevented him from seeing any real human beings, whose unfolding lives form the drama of history. His “tradition,” hidden in secret symbols and encoded rituals, was disembodied from the ways in which any inheritance is transmitted. Guénon showed almost no interest in Western art, literature, or folkways, and his failure was no accident. For he could not acknowledge the animating core of our culture, with its basis in the Bible, whose message he could not bear to confront. Scripture sees time as fraught with meaning. It imagines that eternity is glimpsed in the small dramas of ordinary lives whose every moment is charged with meaning.
Guénon’s return to tradition was no return at all. It was an escape—from the finitude of creaturely life into the imagined citadel of tradition. His error was fundamental and prevented him from being the steward of any tradition that might be renewed. He did not understand that our involvement in history, including our vulnerability to it, is what allows us to seek what is truly human and what is infinitely beyond history. With his vision turned to the mystery of human prehistory, Guénon failed to appreciate the mystery before him. It is the mystery that the deepest human potentialities become full, rich, and perfected only through the adventure of history, where they are tested, illumined, and enhanced. Human beings must live in time, and it is only within a world of change that we can give shape to our souls. Our responsibility to do so gives our lives a perpetual restlessness and discontent. Guénon experienced as a crisis and a loss what is, in truth, a task and calling. And when we see time not as the place of our dispossession, but as our journey toward home, then a more exalted vision of human life opens before us.
narratives and numbers
Something I wrote for a 2020 global health class and in honor of Paul Farmer, who fought the good fight.
Whose Justice? Which Calculations?[1]
“When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies? Perhaps to be too practical is madness. To surrender dreams – this may be madness. Too much sanity may be madness – and maddest of all: to see life as it is, and not as it should be!”
~Miguel de Cervantes, Don Quixote
Tracy Kidder’s Mountains Beyond Mountains is in many ways a book after my own heart. It’s certainly not that my life could compare to Paul Farmer’s, or even that my writing could compare to Tracy Kidder’s. As a Christian, a surgical tech, and a worker in the medical mission field, I have a serious interest in global health, which makes Paul Farmer’s life as attractive and inviting as it is inspiring. And yet, the book would probably not stand out much at all in my own mind if it did not stand so far apart from one of the first assignments in this class, the TED Talk from the famous statistician Hans Rosling.
I have often wondered what exactly Albert Einstein meant when he said that the certainty of mathematics depends on a kind of distance from reality.[2] Of course, he wasn’t saying that mathematics has no relation to reality, but surely it’s true that, since life always retains some degree of mystery and ambiguity (as well as disorder and value), using mathematics requires a certain separation from what we normally experience. I still can’t say that I completely grasp what he meant, but I think that if I were going to apply Einstein’s meaning to the work of any one person in the world, it would be Hans Rosling. In the assigned talk, posted under the title “Reducing Child Mortality—A Moral and Environmental Imperative,”[3] Rosling laments what he claims is the false belief that places like Africa are not doing well or that the data in Africa is nonexistent or unreliable. “I’ll prove them wrong on both points!” he says. What follows this claim is a series of charts and graphs that supposedly prove something. What it is they prove I haven’t figured out, much less how they amount to any sort of “moral imperative.” Maybe it’s best to admit that I’ve never liked talking about people and numbers in the same sentence, so when Rosling says, with no small amount of excitement, that he’s got numbers to prove how wrong we are about the world, that everything is much better than we imagine and experience it to be, I can only feel a certain resistance to his enthusiasm. And it didn’t help that I had already started reading about Paul Farmer.
Putting aside the question of whether the story that Rosling tells—and it is a story—is even factual or narratively correct,[4] it stands in remarkable distinction to the life, and the approach, we are confronted with in Mountains Beyond Mountains. In some ways, the distinction is written in plain language, as when Farmer is asked by Ophelia to define anthropology: “He told her, in effect…that anthropology concerned itself less with measurement than with meaning” (72). In fact, it would seem that in many ways measurement is antithetical to such meaning. The sort of meaning that Farmer has in mind is not the sort that can be gathered and collected to form some point or line on a chart. Continuing to summarize Farmer’s answer about anthropology, Kidder says, “As in mastering a language, one had to learn not just the literal meanings of words but also their connotations, and to grasp those one had to know the politics and economic systems and histories of a place. Only then could you really understand an event like the mango lady’s death” (72).
The mango lady is a woman who, because of inexcusably terrible roads, fell off a truck and died on her way to a market in Haiti. For Farmer (and for Ophelia), she is an unforgettable representation of the myriad needless deaths that take place every day. And for me, she represents at least two clear points of departure from Rosling. First is simply that it was unnecessary—and it matters that it was unnecessary. As Thomas Pogge has pointed out, the problem with data sets, like those Rosling champions, is that they do not tell a moral story at all. “The morally relevant comparison of existing poverty… is not with historical benchmarks but with present possibilities: How much of this poverty is really unavoidable today? By this standard, our generation is doing worse than any in human history.”[5] Like Pogge, Farmer is not ultimately concerned with historical benchmarks but with present ones; he simply thinks we should be doing more, much more, to help the poor. Rather than seeing how historically low the numbers might be, he sees how unnecessarily high they certainly are.
Second—although, in a sense, preceding the first—her death cannot be understood from far away. Farmer’s approach, both through his use of anthropology and through the entire life Kidder portrays, is necessarily a present and personal one. In a word, it is incarnational—only once you’ve embedded yourself into a place like Haiti could you possibly understand what even one death means, much less place some sort of value on it. William James once remarked, in an essay otherworldly to Rosling, that a man “would needs be a presumptuous calculator who should with confidence say that the total sum of significances is positively and absolutely greater at any one epoch than at any other of the world.”[6] Ask a Syrian refugee on the southern border of Turkey, or a Yazidi woman in Iraq, or a Rohingya father in Bangladesh, or a starving child in Yemen—ask them if the world is a much better place than ever before. Whose world? According to whom?[7]
I could not pretend to speak for Rosling, or Farmer, or Kidder, but the experience of reading about Paul Farmer and the experience of listening to Hans Rosling are, it seems to me, as night is to day. On one level, both men believe something very similar: both believe that most of us in the west have a certain view of the world, particularly of poorer countries, and they want to correct that view and promote a corresponding reaction. On a deeper level, the views we are asked to adopt could not be further apart, both in what they view and from where they view it. One invites us to soar above the mountains and see how nice things have become; the other stands where there are mountains beyond mountains and invites us to see the world and history “as if written in collaboration with a Haitian peasant” (116). One rises above the world and organizes numbers to make things look a certain way;[8] the other gets down on his hands and knees to listen to the world and to see what and who we are overlooking. One requires that you be wealthy and well-off and detached enough to do the math; the other requires that you be low and humble and involved enough to hear the poor.
Peppered throughout Kidder’s book, and Farmer’s life, is a quality not only of depth and perspective but also of inspiration. In a world where we are more capable than ever of helping the poor, how do you inspire people to a life of care, service, and sacrifice? This is not only a question repeatedly asked by Farmer, but a question that a view of his life provides the answer to: it’s the life that inspires belief and belief that inspires action. A biography of someone like Paul Farmer’s is not neutral nor does it sit as a collection of data waiting for some application. “Not as a figure to watch from a distance, thinking, Oh, look, there is good in the world. Not as a comforting example, but the opposite” (102). The reason for that discomfort was mentioned earlier in the book: “because it implied such an extreme definition of a term like ‘doing one’s best’” (8).
That challenge is as present today as at any time in any past.[9] And in that sense, Farmer’s life can intimidate as well as inspire. But here again Farmer stands out as an example. He did not begin by trying to change the world, but by applying himself to something relatively small.[10] Whether in Haiti or in downtown Augusta, each of us can be inspired to do the same. Rather than trying to quantify suffering, or progress, or our own moment of greatness, maybe we should listen again to William James, in a quote that Dorothy Day often handed out on little cards:
“I am done with great things and big plans, great institutions and big success. And I am for those tiny, invisible, loving, human forces that work from individual to individual, creeping through the crannies of the world like so many rootlets, or like the capillary oozing of water, yet which, if given time, will rend the hardest monuments of human pride.”[11]
Farmer seems to me to be an invitation to that sort of life, and also proof that that sort of life does not mean a life will have only a minimal impact. In the real world there are not always neat figures and progressing lines; instead there are mountain beyond mountains, and we only remain undefeated because we have gone on trying,[12] listening to and caring for those in need, even in some small but genuine way.
[1] The title is a reference to Alasdair MacIntyre’s Whose Justice? Which Rationality?
[2] “As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality.” Taken from a speech titled “Geometry and Experience,” given at the Prussian Academy of Sciences in Berlin, January 27th, 1921. A transcript can be found here: http://mathshistory.st-andrews.ac.uk/Extras/Einstein_geometry.html
[3] https://www.gapminder.org/videos/reducing-child-mortality-a-moral-and-environmental-imperative/
[4] https://quillette.com/2018/11/16/the-one-sided-worldview-of-hans-rosling/
[5] http://www.themarknews.com/2016/02/07/the-end-of-poverty/
[6] William James, “What Makes Life Significant.” Essay published in 1900. Rosling is, I think, exactly the presumptuous calculator James had in mind.
[7] The UNHCR is apparently not required to share Rosling’s optimism: https://www.unhcr.org/en-us/figures-at-a-glance.html
[8] Jerry Fodor: “It belongs to the millennial moment to want to sum things up and see where were have gotten and point in the direction that further progress lies.”
[9] Charles Taylor, A Secular Age: “Our age makes higher demands of solidarity and benevolence on people today than ever before. Never before have so many people been asked to stretch out so far, and so consistently, so systematically, so as a matter of course, to the stranger outside the gates.” Pg. 695.
[10] Kidder discusses this in the afterword in Mountains Beyond Mountains.
[11] This quote is taken from a fantastic little lecture given in 2016 by the American Catholic theologian William T. Cavanaugh at Biola University Center for Christian Thought: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J0qti9EyZzw
[12] T.S. Eliot, from the epigraph to Kidder’s book.
Light Perpetual

I had to make two attempts, one several months ago, but I read Francis Spufford’s Light Perpetual this week. I can’t say why, but the fist time around I just couldn’t grab on to any of the characters. Even the second time took a little effort and a hundred or so pages. And that lag getting into the book came as a surprise, since the opening chapter is such a completely gripping start.
I don’t think it would be a spoiler to say that every character dies in the first chapter (it says as much on the inside jacket) when a German V-2 rocket explodes at a Woolworth’s in London in 1944. What follows and what makes up the rest of the book is a series of snapshots from the lives that would have gone on had a bomb not gone off when and where it did.
Shoppers, saucepans, ballistic missiles: what’s wrong with this picture? No one is going to tell us. Jo and Alec, as it happens are looking in the right direction. Their gaze is fixed on the gap between the shoulders of Mrs. Jones and Mrs. Canaghan where the rocket is gliding into view. But they can’t see it. Nobody can. The image of the V-2 is on their retinas, but it takes far longer than a ten-thousandth of a second for the human eye to process an image and send it to a brain. Much sooner than that, the children won’t have eyes any more. Or brains. This instant—this interval of time, measurably tiny, immeasurably vast—arrives unwitnessed, passes unwitnessed, ends unwitnessed. And yet it is a real moment. It really happens. It really takes its necessary place in the sequence of moments by which 910 kilos of amatol are delivered among the saucepans.
In one sense, the opening chapter is meaningless to the story and the characters whose lives play out on the pages that follow, since at no point do we revisit what really happened. In another sense, however, much like with the whole of any story, or poem, when you close this book at the end, you can’t help thinking simultaneously about the beginning, about how the stories of these characters have never actually taken place, the lives of each as a child violently cut short. This makes what is otherwise a fairly simple novel into something much more moving—and haunting.
I’m reminded a little of how I felt—or in the inverse of how I felt—at the end of Adam Makos’s A Higher Call. Makos tells the true story that revolves around two pilots, one American B-17 pilot named Charlie Brown, and one German Bf-109 pilot named Franz Stigler. Because Stigler chose not to shoot down a nearly crippled B-17 after a bombing of Bremen, Brown and his crew live to see the future and the families they would never have known because that future and their families would not have existed.
Makos describes the scene at a filmed meeting between Charlie Brown and his crew and Franz Stigler in Massachusetts in 1990:
From above it must have looked funny, the circle of people crowding around one small man in the center, hugging him and one another amid the sounds of tears and laughter. But everyone that day owed something to Franz Stigler, the man in the middle. Because of him, twenty-five men, women, and children—the descendants of Charlie, Blackie, and Pechout—had the chance to live, not to mention the children and grandchildren of Charlie’s other crewmen. . . .
From above, the circle of people blended as they hugged near the [B-17] bomber’s wing, becoming just one mass, bigger and greater as the gaps between them vanished.
That, of course, was a true story all the way through, while Spufford’s story is only based on a true event. (There really was a Woolworth’s in London destroyed by a V-2 rocket in 1944.) But the effect of each story is nearly the same. Somehow, deep down, the thankfulness of the one story is nearly interchangeable with the lament of the other. The fact is, I can imagine, for individuals and for the world, a moment like this—a circle viewed from above as people hug and blend, give thanks and reconcile—for all the lives that went wrong as much as for the ones that went right.
One of the things I like most about Light Perpetual is how Spufford so humanizes each character. This is not a sob story about simply wonderful lives that never got their chance. Though it might be a little overdone at times, each of his characters has as much trouble and tragedy as anything, but each still has some chance for meaning, joy, redemption. Each life is set on some trajectory in a way that we all know as both intimately chosen and yet vastly uncontrollable.
As one character, Jo, is observing a group of young students later in the book, she wonders about the glories and the harms that await them:
But you can’t warn them, any more than you can tell them in terms that would make sense to them that their transformation is glorious. Youth isn’t visible to them, any more than air is. It’s the condition of their lives, but it isn’t a thing that they could imagine not having, and therefore could imagine as being desirable in itself.
In The Sense of an Ending, Julian Barnes puts this eclipsed, front-loaded sense of childhood quite powerfully:
In those days, we imagined ourselves as being kept in some kind of holding pen, waiting to be released into our lives. And when that moment came, our lives—and time itself—would speed up. How were we to know that our lives had in any case begun, that some advantage had already been gained, some damage already inflicted? Also, that our release would only be into a larger holding pen, whose boundaries would be at first undiscernible.
And yet, out of such unknowable, uncontrollable, chaotic sludge come all the tainted goodness and glory and light worthy of the name “life.”
Jo again, reflecting on that same group of students as they sing together:
Can they hear it, this immense organised sound they are making together? Can they hear the organ that they have briefly become, whose separate pipes are all those sticky pink organic tubes in teenage bodies? Imperfect pipes, made of damp twisted cartilage without a single straight line, pumped up by weird fluttering bladders, and yet capable of sounding a chord that seems to lay hold on some order in the world that already existed before we came along and started to sing. Making an order that matches an order. Music is strange, she wants them to see, and one of the things that is strangest about it is that it comes from our messy bodies. Sing, Hayley. Sing, Tyrone. Sing, Jamila, Simon, Samantha, Jerome. Don’t stop till you must. Notice if you can that your temporary orchestra of hormones and still-digesting Big Macs from lunchtime can be coaxed into playing the music of the spheres. If you let yourself be the instrument.
Then the bell goes, and they clatter away laughing.
I think what I would like to see is a book like this, with almost the exact same introductory chapter, but written for characters in the Middle East—say, a family in Afghanistan, killed by a U.S. drone strike. Zamir, Faisal, Farzad, Arwin, Benyamin, Hayat, Malika, Sumaia—what lives might they have lived, “those particles, flecks, shreds, lumps and pieces that, previously, were parts of people; people being missed, waited for, despaired of . . .”? Isn’t this worth wondering, too?
But what has gone is not just the children’s present existence . . . It’s all the futures they won’t get, too. All the would-be’s, might-be’s, could-be’s of the decades to come. How can that loss be measured, how can that loss be known, except by laying this absence, now and onwards, against some other version of the reel of time, where might-be and could-be and would-be still may be?
Which is to say, how can that loss be measured except by the standard of its own existence in time? How can the loss of life be known except by remembering it and lamenting its loss? In the words of Barbara Kingsolver, when she visited Ground Zero in Hiroshima:
I was moved beyond words, even beyond tears, to think of all that can be lost or gained in the gulf between any act of will and its consequences. In the course of every failure of understanding, we have so much to learn.
There is more than enough in any given day’s newsreel, public or private, to provoke this kind of lament, to plead a deep humility, and to warrant a corresponding hope.
It seems right to end where Spufford begins:
Come, other future. Come, mercy not manifest in time; come knowledge not obtainable in time. Come, other chances. Come, unsounded deep. Come, undivided light.
Come dust.